05.30.20

I woke up this morning with the light on, after sleeping in my clothes, on top of my covers. This has been the case for the past three nights. Sleeping for two hours, fully clothed.

When I got up today, I started my normal routine, but realized that the slippers I normally wear to let the dog out weren’t appropriate. Instead, my brain told me to put on the sneakers…just in case. When I got outside, instead of sitting down in the chair to let the dog do his thing, I went out to the street to see if all the windows in my car and van were still there…they were. While fully intact, the car and van were covered in ash from the legacies that burned in North Minneapolis last night.

While I was still in the street my immediate manager called me. We spoke for a few minutes about everything and it was nice to get some words out.

Eventually I made my way back up the driveway to assume some level of morning normalcy and drink my cup of coffee.

A few minutes later the owner of the company I work for called me. He and I spoke for several minutes. He told me he supports me in every way. I appreciate him for that. As we spoke, I cried and then he cried. It was impactful. It felt good to get the tears out.

When we got off the phone I felt different. The air felt different. Everything felt different.

Now, an hour later, as I sit here in the driveway and type this I am calm. I have music playing for the first time in a couple of days. The air in this part of the city is different. I can feel community again. I can feel a sense of togetherness. I can feel a shift in the tide of what has been violence and chaos for the last three days.

I love this city. I love Minneapolis. I love the Midtown neighborhood and I know it’s in pain right now. I am here and I am staying. We will grow through this and beyond it. We will emerge strong and united and hopefully more near equal. I believe that this morning and I hope you do, too.