05.23.20 pt. 2

Two drawers full of soup cans. Some with labels and some without. Cost effective. Time effective. Everything effective. Build community. Stay true. Never sell out. Take what’s yours and leave the rest. Pack it in, pack it out. A family of seven…six of whom appear to be under the age of twenty one. One of whom appears to have abandoned the dress code. Branch Covidians. Snow geese and trumpeter swans. Deer. Tired legs. Just words. Tired every day. More cases popped in the city. The hospitals and busy. Full and getting fuller. Like that house in San Francisco. Tunes in the air. Even the dog is tired. Just writing things as they pop in my head. It’s meditative. Or at least it was way back when in the attic with the little sand garden. Electrical outlets and concrete walls. Redo the floors. Tear out the bathroom. Remodel the kitchen. Do it again. Save space. Spend money. Run on sentence. Run a marathon. Run a 5k. Run until you’re done and then stop running. Ride bikes. Ride them because your ego told you to. Ride them until you quit. Take a break. Find bikes again. Ride them because it feels good. Do push ups. Take rest days. Take care of yourself you big dumb idiot. Stop pushing yourself until you collapse. It didn’t work ever and it’s not working now. Create boundaries and stick to them. Eat better and drink water. Drink more water. Get good sleep. At least try to get good sleep. It is possible. Understand that you are only one person and that as one person you have limits to what you can get done in a day or a week or a month. Understand that if you exhaust yourself by extending yourself to people at work and the kids and the people outside of work that there won’t be anything left for you. Understand burnout. Understand self-care. Understand the importance of taking time to take care of yourself. Laugh. Write this out like its some kind of Baz Luhrman song from the 90’s. You’re ridiculous. Always with the introspection and the self-help. Just relax. Stop looking at the problem and understand that you are a human just like all the other humans and that as such you are subject to feelings and emotions and that you’re not always going to get it right. You will make mistakes. You will stumble. You will get up and try again. You will and eventually you do that enough times that you’ll be old and then you’ll die. Try to have fun along the way. Do things that feel good until they don’t and then do different things. Regret nothing. Go forward. It’s gonna be rad.